On Friday 15 November, Rev Child Addressed pupils on the importance of kindness, to mark anti-bullying week.

8 One of the teachers of the law came and heard them debating. Noticing that Jesus had given them a good answer, he asked him, “Of all the commandments, which is the most important?” 

29 “The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. 30 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ 31 The second is this: ‘Love your neighbour as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” 

32 “Well said, teacher,” the man replied. “You are right in saying that God is one and there is no other but him. 33 To love him with all your heart, with all your understanding and with all your strength, and to love your neighbour as yourself is more important than all burnt offerings and sacrifices.” 

34 When Jesus saw that he had answered wisely, he said to him, “You are not far from the kingdom of God.” And from then on no one dared ask him any more questions. (Mark 12:28-34) 

The passage we’ve just heard from Mark’s gospel is the famous ‘Golden Rule’. It’s a foundational idea in Christianity, that if what you’re doing is motivated by love and kindness, you won’t go far wrong. (Those of you doing GCSE RS will already have discovered that ‘Love your neighbour’ is a fantastically useful all-purpose quote; and for those of you doing A-Level Philosophy, Religion and Ethics, the Greek word used for ‘love’ here is agape, the central theme of Joseph Fletcher’s influential book Situation Ethics. Sorry - I just had to get that in.) 

‘Love your neighbour’ is always an important message. But in fact there’s one detail at the end of this passage that I’d like us to notice. Jesus has this conversation with a teacher of the law, and he’s impressed by what he hears. The passage ends like this: 

‘When Jesus saw that the teacher had answered wisely, he said to him, “You are not far from the kingdom of God.”’ 

It’s just one line. A little moment of respect. Then – end of conversation. But imagine what the effect must have been on the teacher of the law as he walks away with those simple words ringing in his ears. ‘You are not far from the kingdom of God’. And perhaps even more than that, how important was the respect that Jesus had shown him? In fact if you look through the gospels, you frequently find Jesus dispensing short, concentrated moments of respect and encouragement. A gesture here, a one-liner there. Apparently not much – but enough to make someone’s day. 

Respect is a medicine that works in low doses – you don’t always need a lot for it to have an effect. There’s a nice example of this in Notes from a Small Island by Bill Bryson. The book is a modern classic – the insights of an American who tours the UK, seeing it all with fresh eyes. Bryson settled in the Yorkshire Dales for a while and lived in a place called Malhamdale. It took him a while to get used to the people; he was more familiar with the extravagance and the extroverts of the American Mid-West. But he came to appreciate the small gestures of his new home. This is from the book: 

In Yorkshire, little by little, they find a corner for you in their hearts, and drive past you with what I call the Malhamdale wave. This is an exciting day in the life of any new arrival. To make the Malhamdale wave, pretend for a moment that you are grasping a steering wheel. Now very slowly extend the index finger of your right hand as if you were having a small involuntary spasm. That's it. It doesn't look like much, but it speaks volumes, believe me, and I shall miss it very much. 

I love that image of Yorkshire drivers giving the tiniest sign of recognition to an American, who has come to learn that it means a lot. Respect: you don’t always need a lot for it to have an effect. 

On Wednesday you heard from the pastoral prefects and peer supporters about the theme of this year’s anti-bullying week, which is ‘Choose Respect’. They reminded us that ‘when we choose to respect one another, we build stronger, kinder, and more supportive communities.’ I would only add this to their thoughtful message: that respect may not cost you very much at all. It only takes a word of gratitude at the right moment, or even just a quiet signal of appreciation. 

Here is a challenge for you to take into today: see just how concise you can make your encouragements. ‘Brilliant.’ ‘Love it’. ‘That’s so cool.’ That’s all it takes – just a little respect.